Journal Jar Q85: If You Could Go Back In Time & Do One Thing Differently, What Would It Be?

I love these questions, they never fail to make me ponder my memories and chew over various different things in my mind.

Having given this one due consideration, I now have an answer:

I bloody SO wish I’d never taken up smoking.  Considering my best friend died of lung cancer when we were both 16, and I like to think I’m a fairly intelligent human being, I’m really quite mystified as to why I took it up at all.  In fact I remember smoking my first cigarette and having to lie down because I felt so dizzy and sick. Why I continued to smoke for another 15 years is a testament to my utter stupidity.

Giving up smoking is the hardest thing I’ve EVER done.  It was hideous.  I actually remember thinking, well that’s my life over, I’ll never really enjoy anything again.  (It wasn’t, obviously – I’ve always been a bit of a drama queen). 

And I’ll be totally honest, when I’ve had too much to drink  and I’m with a friend who smokes, I’ll sometimes have a puff of their ciggy even now.  I never particularly enjoy it, but I keep on doing it.  I don’t think you’re ever really free of that smoking thing once you’ve started.  Sad, isn’t it?

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4 thoughts on “Journal Jar Q85: If You Could Go Back In Time & Do One Thing Differently, What Would It Be?

  1. Hmmmm, probably hug my Auntie when she asked me to when she lay ill dying in her bed. I was only 7 and was scared – I did hug her but if I’d have known I’d have hugged her so hard she’d have known how much I loved her.

    I also came over to say thank you for the comment you left on my last post. Your thoughts were very much appreciated.

  2. I’ve always been a no regrets girl but I do wish I’d embraced my dark side earlier and ditched my blonde hair at least 10 years ago.
    Vix
    xxx

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