Friday 5 : Jobs I Really Wouldn’t Want

1. Teacher

I’m not a lover of children, particularly en masse, and particularly when they belong to other people.  Therefore, being surrounded by and responsible for 30 of the little buggers on a daily basis is my idea of hell.

2. Pilot

I am a terrible flyer, really REALLY don’t enjoy it at all.  So being a pilot wouldn’t be for me.


3.  Member of the Royal Family

Now don’t get me wrong, there are doubtless some perks here.  But seriously, all that tedious ‘duty’ (can you even IMAGINE how BORING all that smiling, nodding, shaking hands and looking interested in things you couldn’t care less about is?) must be awful.  Not to mention the fact that every single thing about you from your choice of shoes to your eyebrows is written about and criticised in lengthy and graphic detail by the media.  No thank you!


4.  Dog Walker

I don’t like dogs at the best of times, and just the thought of having to pick up dog’s poo in my hand  (notwithstanding a plastic bag barrier) in order to dispose of it in an appropriate waste receptacle makes me retch, frankly.


 5. Dustbinman

Yes, I should probably say Dustbinperson, but I’ve never yet seen a woman doing that particular job, so I’ll stick with ‘man’.   I think it’s an awful job, particularly now that they only empty the waste bin once a fortnight, and we’re not allowed to put the rubbish in sacks, it has to go directly into the wheelie bin – which in summer is effectively like an oven.  By the time emptying day comes around, the whole bin is crawling with maggots – disgusting.  Those poor men have to spend the whole day dealing with these health hazards – it’s a horrible way to have to earn a living, and I take my hat off to them.

Are there any jobs you’d really hate to do?  I’d love to know.


11 thoughts on “Friday 5 : Jobs I Really Wouldn’t Want

  1. I’d agree with you about jobs #2, 3 and 5. I AM job number 1, and sometimes I agree with your comments on that one too! 🙂 I suppose job number 4 is something you get used to – and as a dog owner of nearly 16 years (our dog is going for her telegram-from-the-Queen award we think!), I have finally got used to the poop scooping, although I would draw the line at walking other people’s dogs.
    As far as other jobs I would hate to do is concerned – I think working in a sewage treatment plant can’t be very pleasant, or the responsibility of being a doctor/surgeon where someone’s life could be in my hands (but I admire the work they do hugely). There must be others, but I’ll have to give it some thought.

  2. Agree with you about the Dustbinperson, don´t agree about the Royals, I would love to have all the money in exchange for having to shake a few hands.

    I always wanted to be a Police Officer (just love the fact of bossing people about) but the thought of post mortems and scraping bodies off the motorway just put me off.

  3. Oh my goodness, I can’t even imagine not being allowed to bag our trash before putting it in the container…shudder.

    I think I’d rather be a pilot than a flight attendant…at least the pilot can shut the door on the rest of the plane and doesn’t have to spend the entire flight being nice to people and waiting on them.

  4. Are you saying that you can’t put your rubbish in a bag first and then put it in your bin? Does that mean after every rubbish pickup, you have to clean that awful smelling bin? Is the reason for that because they don’t want you to use plastic bags? I hate all the usage of plastic bags and actually remember years ago switching from paper bags for garbage to plastic. I thought it was awful to have to go out and buy plastic bags to put our garbage in. Look what that turned into! An overload of plastic usage and I can understand the reasoning behind it but for you it becomes a stinky mess and the cleanup of the bin must be horrendous. Did I get that right? Is that the reason?

    • Hi Arlene – yes, you’re right. Everything in the bin has to be biodegradable, otherwise they don’t empty it. Paper bags can be used, but they are as much use as nothing, and cost quite a lot as well. We don’t clean it out every time it’s emptied – there’s little point as it doesn’t stop the maggots reappearing before it’s emptied again – but when we do clean it, it’s a DISGUSTING job.

      • Is that directly in the wheelie bin? I remember in Torquay opening the bin to find all these grains of rice on top of it and thought I cannot remember having rice last night…..of course like you say it was maggots. Ghastly.

  5. I loved teaching! 🙂 Even after 30 years or so and I even loved the teenagers! I am so with you on the dog one but where do you live that you can’t line your bins? I can’t imagine that job at all. I couldn’t work in an abatoir! 😦

  6. Feeling sick about the banned plastic bin bags and the maggots btw.
    my dreaded jobs….
    1. Abatoir (?) worker… also heard the plants where they kill the chicken/turkeys to make nuggets are equally as vile.
    2. Eviction officer. I wouldn’t be hard enough to turf people out on the street.
    3. Social worker. I think I would be fair but the emotional toll would just kill me.
    4. Bra measurer lady. Have enough faff with my own boobs and bras. And would no doubt see some horrors during said measuring.
    5. NHS manager. Cuts etc. Wouldn’t be able to look myself in the mirror…..

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